the tale of our move, a switch to new cable/internet provier, and a new computer purchase, in numbers

time spent on the phone with verizon: 3.5 hours

time spent on the phone with time warner: 11 hours

time spent on the phone with microsoft: one hour and counting

time spent on the phone with apple: 5 hours

time spent on the phone with at&t: 2 hours

number of voicemail messages left for an at&t supervisor whose number i was given by a technician: 4

number of 'i'm-going-to-lose-my-shit-on-you-if-you-don't-call-me-back" voicemail messages left for an at&t supervisor whose number i was given by a technician: 1

number of hours the at&t technician spent at our home before leaving without completing installation: 10

number of days since technician was last here: six

number of custom stainless steel outlet plates technician took with him for some inexplicable reason: two

number of hours before at&t returns to complete assignment: unknown

number of days we have been without landline service in palm springs: 53

number of days no one has changed the spelling of my last name on my verizon account from "bush" to its correct spelling: 22