twister

i've never been in a tornado, but i sure feel like i have over the last week. to recount a few key events:

* was castigated at length by a crotchety golf course employee, resulting in free golf
* was castigated at length by a crotchety dry cleaning manager, resulting in a near-stroke on my part
* our current palm springs house went into escrow (knock on wood)
* put an offer in on a new palm springs house (knock on wood)
* received unexpected work from unexepected channels
* heard from several people i never thought i'd hear from again
* our kitchen in los angeles is almost finished, but not without a few lively arguments with the contractors
* bereft of groceries, the mister and i ate a block of cheese - plain, with a butter knife -- for lunch

and there's more:

* had picture taken with oscar nominee ryan gosling
* had the best dirty martini i've ever had, so went on to sample a few more, on a school night, no less (but i wasn't alone! oh no! far from it!)
* did tequila shots straight from the bottle on willie nelson's tour bus
* did tequila shots (in a glass this time) with 'pooty,' willie nelson's road manager for 36 years, in an undisclosed location
* looked on in curiousity at fran drescher in leather pants
* missed talking to arianna huffington as she stood a foot from me for some length of time as i didn't notice her (i couldn't see past the wine glass in my hand, apparently)
* made plans to go to costco, target & ikea all in the same night
* spent lots of time in a small room with johnny knoxville, harry dean stanton, and luke wilson (and with all that talent, we were still the most entertaining people in the room)

so, if you're wondering why the lyrical robot seems to have malfunctioned altogether, you now have a bit of an idea why.